Wednesday July 19th

Although work started a little later than Sunday, I still woke up at 5am. This time I definitely didn’t snooze. I went to get my coffee then did a little excel for totaling my costs. I didn’t finish as it took longer than I thought.

 
 

While at work, I was thinking of my past relationships with people. For certain people, I would think they were weird at first, then they were kinda bad, or like this and like that, etc. but I realized something: I’m pretty weird myself. I’m so weird, that I can’t really objectively gauge the weirdness of other people in any meaningful way. I shouldn’t worry or even think about past relationships, I should focus on improving and building on myself so that I can become the kind of person I am proud to be. In doing so, I can live a great life, with great people.

 
 

After work I went to an equipment store, just to check it out. I didn’t buy anything, but need to get my own boots and coveralls so it’s good to plan early. I may just use kijiji for the coveralls. Afterwards, I went to a place called “fat burger” to get a beef and a crispy chicken burger. They were good but no doubt, the sauces were probably canola oil based. It was already 9:30 by the time I finished eating. I swung by Walmart to get a McCain marble cake and 4L of water, then went to the gym to shower. Afterwards I went back to the same Wallys, found a good spot, and hunkered down for the night. I probably fell sleep around midnight.

 
 

Expenses:

Tims: $2.45

Fat Burger: $15.75

Walmart: $8.25

Total: $26.47

 

Thursday July 20th

The long hours at works are making it so I can’t do a lot of the things that I used to. A lot of it was just pondering life, googling things I didn’t know, looking into entrepreneurial pursuits, etc. I had a lot of meaningful things I did, like these journal posts, or have a decent night’s sleep. When I woke up this morning, I filled all my empty water bottles from the 4L jug, then went for my coffee.

 

While I was there, I was doing some car organizing, I can’t remember. Car life stuff, you know. Anyways, I think one of the patrons at Tims saw my sleeping arrangement, because he struck a conversation with me. Then, a few minutes later when I was getting my coffee, he walked up and he insisted to pay for my coffee, and even wanted to get me a muffin or donut. I had to tell him I still had cake so I can’t accept any more pastry. This kind man’s name was Falim (or Fahim, I’m awful with names). I thanked him but didn’t exactly know how to handle it, as I’ve never had that happen to me before.

 
 

At work, I was helping a new operator today. She seemed pretty cool, and aware of the clown world, but is more possessive of the sucker tool. While at a fracking site, it took me like 25 minutes to get the health/safety passing test thing. I learned a shortcut that I won’t share here. In the truck, we had some pretty cool convo for our first day working together. I don’t think I ever wrote about the idea of there being something in this world/simulation that doesn’t exist, in order to prevent us from creating this very same type of world/simulation. Let me elaborate.

 
 

The idea is that we are living in a simulation. At least it’s what we would normally call a “simulation”. Everything may even be here, and very real, but in a way, it’s created within another medium. Just like The Sims, in the video game, are real in their own world, but are the product of 1’s and 0’s. Our reality is the same, but it’s not 1’s and 0’s, but what we call physics… maybe… quantum physics..? Well, I don’t want to get down into the dirt of that stuff, but here is my point:

 
 

Just like real actual physics does not exist in The Sims, nor does the magic juice (for lack of a better phrase, I’m not sure how else it can be described) that created our world, exist within this one. Let’s say we made a Sims game where all foundational principles of electronics, computer, software, and so on, were implemented, so that the Sims could make their own unique creations, software applications, etc. Eventually there would be a series of events where they made a Sims-like game, capable of making other Sims games, and they did, and the process would continue. The first instance of the simulation would contain infinite instances, and thus an infinite amount of data to compute, resulting in a crash. The same applies to our real-world simulation idea.

 
 

We could create another world with actual people (contained in a coffee cup, let’s say) and then given that this world we created was created in the same way ours was, they would also have the magic juice. That world could create another, and so on and so forth, cascading all the way down to infinite. Our world would ‘crash’, and the simulation would end. So, I think our creators made this world lacking something really important… maybe that is also why there are so many awful problems in this world, and they keep building up. It could be unrelated, but it could also be an important side effect. So yea, this ‘magic juice’ is basically an element or concept which can’t be manifested or described in any sense, within our dimension. It could even be a higher consciousness.

 
 

Anyways, after work, I went to check out a room rental from a nice couple in a part of town I like. Everything looks great, and the price is good. I’m a little hesitant, because I’m really quite used to this hectic and difficult to control lifestyle. However, there are a lot of pros of having a place to hang my hat (even though I’m pretty sure my hat flew out the window the next day). Besides all the obvious ones, it would be great to unload some of the things from my car so I can actually find my things without having to take things out and move things around like a lunatic. I am thinking I may do a hybrid lifestyle, because this way of living is a lot more exciting – and is much more lively. It’s quite an enjoyable lifestyle – to have all your things in your car, so they go wherever you go, it’s difficult to describe. But like I said, it can also be quite difficult, so I sort of need a place I can fall back to incase I really just want to work on my car, charge my power box, cook a nice meal, store some of my belongings, do laundry, etc.

 
 

After checking the place out, I went to a restaurant that I misinterpreted as a pizza joint. I decided against spending $30 for a pizza, and went across the road to pizza hut to see their special. It smelt like burnt corpses in there, so I left that place fairly quick. I decided I would go to the furthest south Walmart where I got a box of blueberries, and devoured an entire chicken while watching Mad Max Fury Road. I was so full and so hot afterwards; I looked up a Tims nearby that was open 24/7 inside. Before I signoff with my expenses, here’s a photo of where I wrote this. I stored my blueberries under their frozen pizza in the Tims refrigerator section!

 
 

 

Expenses:

 Walmart: $21.38

Tims: $2.45

Total: $23.83

 

Friday July 21st

I nodded off as I woke up this morning. I came to, about an hour or so later, at 6, in quite the panic. I didn’t want to miss work my first week, I would feel so stupid! Today at work, we were cleaning out built up water in trenches. It was crazy work, I was a real slave today. But it was kind of cool… trenches!!!

 
 

After work I cleaned up, got some garlic pizza from a local 2for1 pizza shop, and went to confirm my rental unit. I texted them on our way back with the truck. The whole time, and even now, I am a little sad that I sort of copped out, and got a place. The car life is so exciting, I’m always busy trying to survive and learn how to cooperate with people. The place is good, it has all the amenities that you would expect, and is cheap at the same time. One of my worries was also that I haven’t yet evened out from my expenses, so paying for a room is almost like an unnecessary expense. But I don’t have to pay for laundry, and I can make my own coffee. Those are just two, I’m sure there’s others.

 

After I dropped off first and last months rent, I went to Walmart to eat and finish watching Mad Max. I ate 2 medium garlic bread pizzas with dips. I regret it so much… the movie finished with an amazing quote:

 

“Where must we go… we who wander this Wasteland, in search of our better selves?”

 

I went inside Walmart, got a can of gloss white tremclad, and went “home”. I had heat stroke, and started having some mild visual hallucinations, as I gazed at the rough finish (what’s that called) ceiling. I had a ton of ice water, and went back and forth from my car into the house, while I was getting swarmed by mosquitoes. I also brought my power box inside, so I could fully charge it. I fell asleep in a bed for the first time in nearly 4 weeks.

 

Expenses:

 Coffee: $2.45

Pizza: $15.25

Walmart $13.35

Total: $31.05

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